What if I told you that there was a simple mindset shift that will drastically improve your decision making?
I was chatting with an older colleague a few days ago. He is in his 60s, and a few years away from retirement. We were talking about his career journey. He was giving me some advice, reflecting on some of the major choices he’s made over the years.
He told me about a huge raise he got a couple of years ago. The raise came with a relocation. As a single dad raising two teenage daughters, money had been tight for a long time, and he had been working toward that raise for years.
With that extra money, he could finally relax a bit. He would send his daughters $5,000 checks every other week to take care of expenses. He paid off his mortgage; financially, things were finally comfortable. Life was good.
He paused for a while, and all of a sudden, he had a sober look on his face
“I wish I hadn’t taken that raise though,” he said.
“Why?” I asked.
He explained that the relocation strained his relationship with his daughters, especially the older one. She made some poor decisions, especially with men. He wasn’t around the way he used to be. And looking back, that raise, which obviously meant a lot at the time, didn’t seem to be worth it.
Tough decisions…
There are few things in life that are more stressful than having to make a difficult decision.
We’ve all been there.
Especially the kind of decisions where the options are laid out clearly in front of you, yet you still can’t decide. You sit and ponder. You go back and forth.
Career choices. Relationships. Major purchases. Moves.
There are few things in life that are more stressful than having to make a difficult decision.
But when decisions are hard, they take a real toll on the mind.
Most times its about not knowing.
If only we could see the future, right? Life would be much easier.
Have you noticed that when you think back to a rough period in your life, in hindsight, it never feels as difficult as it did in that moment? Looking back, the choices seem easier, 100 percent of the time.
Psychologists call this the “hindsight bias”.
“I should have done X.”
“Why didn’t I think of Y?”
Imagine if there was a way to borrow that clarity before making the decision?
What if I told you that there was a way to peek into the future without actually being there yet? Think of the impact this would have on your decision making.
The Power of Imagination.
The great Albert Einstein once said “logic that can take you from A to Z, but imagination can take you anywhere.
How can you use imagination to improve your decision making?
The trick is using your imagination to mentally project yourself into the future.
neuroscience shows that the brain cannot reliably distinguish between real and vividly imagined experiences. Brain imaging studies demonstrate that similar neural pathways are activated whether an experience is happening or being vividly imagined.
That means you can use your imagination to mentally project yourself into the future.
What you do specifically is to anchor yourself to a specific point in time. 5 years from now, ten, or twenty. Your choice.
And then from that vantage point, look back at the decision as if it has already been made. Play out both realities and really sit with each outcome. Pay attention to how each one feels. Not just logically, but emotionally.
Which reality makes you feel happier? At peace? More fulfilled? More aligned with who you are.
Obviously, this doesn’t guarantee a perfect decision every time. Nothing does. It is impossible to see all the variables, curve balls, that life will throw at you.
What it does is to dramatically improve the quality of your decision making, because you are no longer deciding only from fear, or the pressure of the present moment. Instead, you’re deciding from perspective, considering your future self.
And that changes everything.
To recap, here is a step-by-step direction to how you achieve this;
Step 1: Pick a future anchor point.
Choose a time far enough away to give perspective. I typically do 10 years
Step 2: Imagine you chose Option A.
Picture a normal day in your life ten years from now. Where are you living? Who is around you? What feels different? Sit with it for a moment.
Step 3: Notice your internal response.
Notice the feeling in your body. Tension? Relief? Regret? Peace? Fullfiled?
Step 4: Reset and imagine Option B.
Same future point. Same exercise. Let it play out honestly.
Step 5: Compare the two.
Which future feels more fulfilling? Peaceful, More aligned? More like the life you actually want.
Practicing this exercise, has helped me avoid pitfall that comes from a place of emotions and momentary pressure, giving me the ability to make decision from a place of faith, and hope instead of fear.